Lying on the floor — It was hard to breathe I had to make all of these decisions on my own My mother needed me to be a mother to her I needed to be a mother to myself and my young son You decided to leave And I fell to the floor Money makes…

A story about hypervigilance — They asked her if she had fun and she shrugged her shoulders not knowing the word’s meaning. She may have laughed and let loose a little but that shadow still loomed over her. Her guard was never down. What is fun? She asked. They said fun is when you enjoy…

In 25 years — In 25 years 5 years, 5 times I have yet to let a drink Cross these Rosy lips They have smiled And frowned They have grimaced Out of pain And discomfort They have cried out For a drop But the reserve Was strong And abstinence Won out Day After day …

To my newly deceased grandmother — My grandmother passed away a couple of weeks ago and I just found this in a drawer. I actually wish I would have sent it. So I will share it here, in case it helps another person fight toxic genealogical dysfunction:) I think I just invented that. Grandma Dolly, I…

I Turn To You — I call out to you You bring me back And remind me who I really am Through your eyes I begin to see That my mind Was telling me lies Making me feel Worried Catastrophizing About what could Be But not seeing That you’ve led me this Far Not to…

Didn’t You? — You are still the same person And being on a beach in a yellow dress Is not going to change that. Did you think your fears would dissipate once You passed the line into A sunnier state? Did you think the sand was magic and would Take away your insecurities and…

He asked me to go down — He asked me to wash it at 3 years old He asked me to lie on the garbage sack At 4 years old He grinded on my little body in the bed when no one was around Why was no one around Mom? He asked me to shake it And he…

I stopped drinking while you were alive — But barely living Tied to a hospital bed With delirium tremens My stomach pregnant With life While you clung to yours I couldn’t be strong enough for Both of us That day I floated Out As my tears Rocked me And cradled me Like I wish You could have I…

Is CBD off-limits? — There are so many new drinks and tasty items on the market lately. I have been in recovery from drugs and alcohol for a long time and my choices have always been so minimal, but now I have noticed how many non-alcoholic drinks are on the market. …